God Is Imaginary!

Fundamentalist Muslims like to kill people, while moderate Muslims are easily offended.

Why?

I think it’s because their so-called “prophet” is an embarrassment… and woe be to anyone who draws attention to his sexual exploits.

For those of you who don’t know the story, here’s a quick recap:

At the age of 49, Muhammad was betrothed to a six-year-old girl named Aisha, who was the daughter of his friend Abu Bakr.

Three years later, at the age of nine, Aisha began menstruating: a sign for old man Muhammad to “marry” the child and sexually consummate their union.

Now, Muslims can sugarcoat this all they want – but adults who have sex with children are called pedophiles. They are child rapists who should be locked up and castrated. In other words, they are the usual sort of scum who convince themselves and their mindless followers that they are “prophets” of “god.”

So when a book by Sherry Jones dared to describe Muhammad’s very real sexual relationship with his child-bride… wouldn’tcha know it?… all hell broke loose.

According to Muslim journalist, Asra Q. Nomani, before writing The Jewel of Medina: A Tale of Lust, Love and Intrigue in the Prophet’s Harem, Ms. Jones learned Arabic, studied scholarly works about Aisha’s life, and came to admire her protagonist as a woman of courage. For her efforts, Ms. Jones signed a $100,000, two-book deal with Random House and The Jewel of Medina was slated to hit the streets today.

But Random House chickened out and reneged on their deal, because “credible and unrelated sources” said “the publication of this book might be offensive to some in the Muslim community… and could incite acts of violence by a small, radical segment.”

Denise Spellberg, an associate professor of Islamic history at the University of Texas in Austin, is allegedly the one who instigated the panic.

According to Ms. Nomani, Ms. Spellberg contacted Shahed Amanullah, the editor of a popular Muslim website, and told him that the novel “made fun of Muslims and their history” and asked him to warn Muslims.

Mr. Amanullah then sent an e-mail to a listserv of Middle East and Islamic studies grad students, telling them that the forthcoming novel was found to be “incredibly offensive.”

The next day, Mr. Amanullah’s e-mail was posted on “Hussaini Youth,” a website for Shiite Muslims, with the headline, “Upcoming book, ‘Jewel of Medina’: A new attempt to slander the Prophet of Islam.”

Then some guy by the name of Ali Hemani proposed “a seven-point strategy” to ensure “the writer withdraws this book from the stores and apologise[s] [to] all the muslims across the world.”

Meanwhile, an editor at Random House’s Knopf imprint sent an e-mail to Knopf executives informing them that Ms. Spellberg thought there was a “very real possibility of major danger for the building and staff and widespread violence… a declaration of war… explosive stuff… a national security issue… far more controversial than the satanic verses and the Danish cartoons… [and] thinks the book should be withdrawn ASAP.”

Finally, the author was told that the publishing of her novel was indefinitely postponed for “fear of a possible terrorist threat from extremist Muslims” and concern for “the safety and security of the Random House building and employees.”

In defence of the book, Ms. Nomani writes, “For all those who believe the life of the prophet Muhammad can’t include stories of lust, anger and doubt, we need only read the Quran (18:110) where, it’s said, God instructed Muhammad to tell others: ‘I am only a mortal like you.’”

Muhammad was mortal all right, but rest assured, his “instructions” from Allah were nothing more than the voices in his head.

Ms. Spellberg called the novel a “very ugly, stupid piece of work.” Perhaps what she really meant was that Muhammad was a “very ugly, stupid piece of work.”

Here is an excerpt from the book:

This was the beginning of something new, something terrible. Soon I would be lying on my bed beneath him, squashed like a scarab beetle, flailing and sobbing while he slammed himself against me. He would not want to hurt me, but how could he help it? It’s always painful the first time.

The pain of consummation soon melted away. Muhammad was so gentle. I hardly felt the scorpion’s sting. To be in his arms, skin to skin, was the bliss I had longed for all my life.”

Ms. Spellberg is quoted as saying, “I don’t have a problem with historical fiction. I do have a problem with the deliberate misinterpretation of history. You can’t play with a sacred history and turn it into soft core pornography.”

Obviously, I don’t believe there’s anything “sacred” about Mohammad’s life. But I do think Ms. Spellberg has a point about “deliberate misinterpretation,” as I’m quite certain a nine-year-old girl would not have “longed” to be raped by a 52-year-old man.

As I said, Muhammad is likely an embarrassment to his modern-day followers who don’t have the cojones to admit their “prophet” was nothing but a sexual deviant, a womanizer, and a charlatan.

Sherry Jones was quoted as saying, “My portrayal of Muhammad is extremely respectful, and of the origins of Islam is very accurate and respectful… Muhammad says in the Koran that he was a mortal. I assume he did all the things a man does. He had 12 wives – I’m sure he had sex with them.”

Of course he did. But shhh…. don’t tell anybody.

[sources: The Wall Street Journal, The Guardian, Answering Islam]